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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 9/13/2010 Posts: 786 Location: east anglia
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Yes, I'm beginning to realise that I don't know the half of it (yet) - but I'm sure there'll be the odd slip ups after a few of Sheila's thimbles when the parties start! 
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Now... I'm missing a few feathers from my arrows - I'm not accusing anyone BUT the feathers adorning Doreen's trolley look remarkably similar! 
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,689 Location: Durham
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Doreen might well be responsibe - she`s forever on the lookout for items to tart up her trolley.She once decorated it with multi-coloured umbrellas in the hopes it would fly. It was while she was going through her "Mary Poppins" phase.
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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Now you just leave my trolley alone!  They are my feathers, didn't I tell you I am going in for the olympic feather throwing contest?
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Feather Throwing!  , I'm talking about Archery - you know - serious stuff - like: Robin Hood, Little John, Friar Tuck et al, they beat the 'all comers', including the local Sheriff! I can't compete in the Olympics without feathers in my arrows! Never mind, I'll see my Rheummy Nurse and ask her if she will script me some on the NHS, perhaps then I can tickle myself better! In the meantime...I'll see if I can find some 'merry men' 
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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Merry? MERRY????????????? You certainly wont find anything remotely resemblng merry on here, Marian.
I have to say that this weekend's events have left me staggered. Edinburgh Castle has been standing for almost an aeon and Sheila and Lyn, who obviously cannot be trusted with even a feather, have managed to shake it's very foundations with an ill judged, and very ill timed 21 gun salute to mark the start of queeny's Diamond Joob. As for Doreen - well, words fail me. How could she cash in on this tragic situation selling cakes, tea and whatever else she has on that damned feathered trolley, to the bystanders? Lyn has now taken to demolishing signboards above shops (it makes shopping more exciting, she said on the news this morning). She has spent the night incarcerated in a cell and the men in white coats are on their way to pick her up as I type.
I fear this is not a good start to the celebrations. We HAVE to get our act together
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 9/13/2010 Posts: 786 Location: east anglia
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oh dear poor lynn,men in white coats maybe they are aliens on her side coming to help her get away,acting like merry men,the guns were a sign,or they could be shop owners getting their own back, taking lynn on a day trip to clacton,for r/r before the queens do.now where is the trolly hiding,cant see that feather yet and me needs refreshments
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 854
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Oh dear!  Poor Lyn: we could visit her on the portaloo and take some goodies -- no scissors!  It may be best if they kept her there for a while so that we can get the olympics over before she is released? I don't think that we should be as quick to rescue her as we have resued others  . Doreen most positively has got some new pink feathers on the trolley. She was standing by the demolished Edinburgh castle selling hot drinks and my special cake which was meant to help us during the games! Now I will have to make more!
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Oh yes, you must make some more cake - I think Lyn and Sheila are going to need some when they finally get back (I wouldn't mind some myself, actually!) Now I've acquired some new tartan feathers for my arrows so there will be no mistaking who they belong to - so don't even think about it!  I've been practicing in the back garden and I'm getting better - although there has been the odd accident.  Last week one of my arrows went sailing over a few fences and I think it made contact because there's a little yappy dog that doesn't seem to yap so much now!
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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Hmmmm.....tartan feathers ! Just the thing to tart up my trolley! 
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009
Posts: 302
Location: Rainham Kent
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No trolley worth its wheels should should consider going out without tartan feathers and a diamond tiara this year!!!!!! Anne
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,689 Location: Durham
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You`re not bringing that trolley to the Diamond Jubilee are you, Doreen? Please try and remember the chaos you caused in the Abbey at Kate & William`s wedding - I`m not sure the Royals would welcome a repeat performance on the Thames, and you can`t rely on Eleanor and I to get you out of trouble every time. And for heaven`s sake, bring some water wings - you know what happened in the fountains at Trafalgar Square, though admittedly that was all Jean`s fault.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Don't worry Kathleen, there will be no repeated chaos at the Diamond Jubilee because if any of my new tartan feathers go missing I shall be using trolley wheels as target practice!
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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How DARE you even think about using Dor's trolley wheels as target practice? Do you really want her to "go off on one again"? Last time, she streaked up the prom at Blackpool, closely followed by Lyn and her chain saw, and caused a major incident below the Tower. Please don't ask me to go into details - but think Kathleen, snake and Neddy and you may bergin to get an inkling!
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,689 Location: Durham
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Leave that snake out of it - he was just an innocent bystander. If Doreen hadn`t started playing that damn flute he would have stayed coiled up in his basket!
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Rank: Advanced Member
Groups: Registered
Joined: 11/9/2010
Posts: 73
Location: Surrey
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Aw my gawd! Is Blackpool Tower still standing?
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,689 Location: Durham
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That`s a question we don`t answer!
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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It was, after that incident, but then Lyn went back with her chainsaw.....
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Rank: Advanced Member Groups: Registered
Joined: 9/13/2010 Posts: 786 Location: east anglia
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brings a whole new meaning to "it's an age thing",i have let my daughter read this she is 26 and just off to uni for nursing next week,she read it and just rolled her eyes and went off laughing she now has concerns for my mental health,i have told her" don't worry be happy",she reckons i am mad and this confirms it ah the joys of life, now what tartan are these feathers then and do we need water wings or the lifeguards from earlier,mmmmmmmmmmm,must find sheila for a tipple thimble and cake i need to relax
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